It hit me like an earthquake- there was no warning & no time to prepare.
I guess that’s not fair, I knew the day would come were I lost more mobility- afterall Progressive is right there in the name. It’s part of the battle, but it’s not the whole fight. But still, I wasn’t prepared.
One second everything is fine– my version of normal, the next I lost it. Everything changed in that moment, but there was no going back- no undoing the damage the earthquake left behind.
All I could do was pick up what I had left scattered around me and build my new normal. There was no time to grieve what was no longer there. It was time to suit up and battle life while the beast tried to defeat me.
He tried to win, but he forgot who he was fighting against.
I was tired and defeated in all the worst ways. I was in an unfathomable amount of pain, but I didn’t have a choice.
I was busy growing bone & learning my “new normal”, and he was busy throwing pieces of my old life back in my face. He didn’t know some would hit me, some would knock me down longer than others, but I always, always get back up ready to fight.
There was pain, there was anger, but there was also hope, and there was determination.
It hit me like an earthquake. It destroyed my normal. But it didn’t destroy me & it never will.
I am tired of the fight. But I will get up. I will figure out this new normal but give me some time to collect what is left of the life I once knew.
This earthquake didn’t destroy everything. It’s time to pack up what’s left and move on to my new life.
It’s slow and messy and takes a lot of grace, but I will get there– I always do and I always will.